A celebrity’s Personal Assistant (PA) has many responsibilities. It is the PA’s job to make appointments, create schedules, and arrange for any number of special requests and requirements. The PA often is responsible for seeing that the celebrity arrives on time with all supplies or equipment he/she needs to be successful on the job at hand. PAs make themselves available to run errands and fulfill various needs of the celebrity.

With all this in mind, I’d like to suggest some of the specific tasks I would like to accomplish in the position as Rupert Grint’s PA. I’m sure Rupert is quite happy with his current PA, but just in case there’s an opening…..

If I was Rupert Grint’s Personal Assistant, on working days I’d make sure he had a ‘live’ wake-up call with a chauffer waiting in the driveway.
Wakey, wakey, Mary Sunshine. See, isn’t it much nicer when I do it, than using that nasty alarm clock?

If I was Rupert Grint’s Personal Assistant, I’d make sure he is only seen in public wearing tight black jeans.
You pick out the tee-shirt Rupe, I’ll get the rest.

If I was Rupert Grint’s Personal Assistant, I’d help him go over his lines from the daily call sheets. Of course, the Hermione/Ron scenes would demand much attention, just to make sure there’s enough emotional integrity.

If I was Rupert Grint’s Personal Assistant, I would make sure Quentin Tarantino and Bill Murray received a birthday card each year from Rupert.

If I was Rupert Grint’s Personal Assistant, he would never miss a phone call or a script sent from his agent.
The title says ‘My Little Pony,’ but I think you should still take a look at it.

If I was Rupert Grint’s Personal Assistant, I would ask him to help me improve my golf swing.
Now let me see, is this the proper stance? How’s my follow-through? Come over here and show me.

If I was Rupert Grint’s Personal Assistant, I would carry around an extra cell phone (mobile) for him….just in case.
Bilius, have you seen my mobile? I think I’ve lost it again.

If I was Rupert Grint’s Personal Assistant, fans asking for hugs might have to fill-out a personality inventory first.
All Manics and Personality Disorders are dismissed. Obsessives and all others, the line forms on the right. Please wait your turn.

If I was Rupert Grint’s Personal Assistant, I would have Stickley turn Rupert’s ‘bumcast’ into a lovely new set of chairs and sofa for my living room.
Ahhh, these are the most comfortable chairs I’ve ever sat upon.

If I was Rupert Grint’s Personal Assistant, I would ask all the Stills Photographers for first pick of Rupert’s set shots.

If I was Rupert Grint’s Personal Assistant, the infamous audition tape would never see the light of day, except when I take it out of the vault to watch it.

And last but not least…

If I was Rupert Grint’s Personal Assistant, I would log in anonymously to the ICM Forum and spill all the juicy bits to you bums.

sarah1
Good news Rupert, I talked to the lads in ‘Props’ at Leavesden. There’s a 75% chance they’ll let me sneak the bumcast out while everyone’s on hiatus!
Rupert Grint with his real PA, Sarah

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4 Comments

  1. Ivana says:

    Roflmao Bilius, this is great. 😀

  2. Laura says:

    LMAO. Awesome.

  3. WJo says:

    “All Manics and Personality Disorders are dismissed. Obsessives and all others, the line forms on the right. Please wait your turn.”
    I have tears in my eyes of laughing after reading this ^
    I want to be his PA too! or at least his blanket-holder, I’d perfect for that job lol

  4. Bilius says:

    Thanks guys! I’m serious WJo — all those crazies can just STEP AWAY 🙂

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